Salzberg

            “The hills are alive…,” this is the song that is playing in my head as we head into Salzberg for a day trip. Surrounded by the Alps, the setting of The Sound of Music, large enough to be interesting, but still very picturesque, Salzberg is the perfect place to get your Julie Andrews on, as we’ve been trying to get Neil to do since Bratislava.

            Kyle’s breakfast of a cinnamon roll the size of his face fortifies him as we begin our tour at Mirabel Schloss and gardens. The palace is very nice, but the manicured gardens are the real attractions. It is around the fountain here that the Sound of Music children danced. It is also here that Kyle rides a unicorn statue.

            We cross the bridge and head to Monchsberg, built right into the mountain, This takes us up into the Alps, where we have a great view and saw some old city walls. It is here that we also saw a giant nest o’ snails.

            We descend to the Festspielhaus, built right into the rock, which is the stage used in The Sound of Music. Getting back into town, we see some “hunks of art”, including giant pickles. We found St. Peter’s Church, and next to it St. Peter’s Stiftskeller, advertised as the oldest restaurant in Europe, established in 803 by St. Peter’s monks. After peeking in, we went around back and explored St. Peter’s cemetery.

            Right next to some public art, a man standing on a golden ball and a big chess set, is the Dom, a very beautiful and old church whose interior I’m unfortunately only able to get a glimpse of as there’s something going on that day.

            We head towards Residenzplatz, famous as a place of Hitler’s book burnings, as well as having the large fountain. We tried to encourage Neil’s dancing, but no. It is also here that they had the state apartments, as well as the chiming glockenspiel. While walking through, I saw two nuns and almost asked, “So, how do you solve a problem like Maria?”

            Another interesting thing about Salzberg is that you see a lot of people walking around in traditional garb, and a lot of it sold in shops. I don’t know if they all work for the tourist trade or what…

            Then it’s to Alter Market (Old Market) and the Aldstadt, where we catch lunch at Zum Mohren (i.e. “moors”), a restaurant known for serving international food since the 1700s. Franz Schubert and Mozart both are said to have eaten there. Neil and I get Indian food.

            We head through Mozart platz and take a tram up the mountain to Hohensalzberg Castle and Fortress, where we get a great view of the city as well as a tour of the castle, including St. George’s Chapel, circa 1502.

            Our final 2 spots are Mozart’s birthplace and a hill for Neil to sing on. To find this last important one, we pass through a small street fest called “Funkytown”, where we got to hear Austrian funk music, which includes a tuba. We never did find that hill for Neil…

            We get to the train station, where a middle-aged Canadian is very impressed with the 5 words of German I can read from a sign (and yet didn’t want to admit that he was a tourist) and decided to “follow my lead.” Our train turns out to be a double decker (something we’ve been wanting to ride) and we to look at the beautiful scenery as we head back to Munich.

            Once there, we pick up 3 last sites: the amazing Maximilaneum, the Isartor, and Lukaskirche. We also see some Germans on a “beach” along the river. We have a dinner of brats and ribs at a nearby beer garden, and get to see some of Munich’s night life before heading back to the hostel.
P.S. Neil had a dream that he had a mole in the shape of Austria.

Munich

We got to Munich in one piece, bought subway passes, and went into the city to what we thought was our hostel, but it turns out that our hostel was right next to the train station. So, we dragged our luggage back to the subway, backtrack, and are consulting the map when a very nice older Englishman asks us if we need help. We say that we’re looking for the Locarno and think that it’s right over there, and point. “Well, you didn’t need my help at all, did you?”

            We go there, check in, and head out for a little sight-seeing in Munich.

            Munich is a very nice city, to which the closest comparison would be Dresden. Like Dresden, it has a lot of history, but it does not seem to be consumed by it as much. One thing about Munich, at least when we were there, is that it was filled with construction everywhere. “This is how Merkel keeps people working,” said Neil.

            We pass the impressive Palace of Justice and head into the historical part of town. The first thing we see there is St. Michael’s Church. It’s under construction, so we can’t really see the outside, but the inside is gorgeous, another wedding cake church, white and gold and bright and open.

            Afterwards, we proceed to Asamkirche, a church “not for anyone with ADD,” according to Kyle. Small and ornate, it is packed with filigree and odd decorations. One feature is the mummy wrapped in jewels.

            We then saw the Frauenkirche, partly under construction, with its domed twin towers. Almost completely destroyed in WWII, it’s not much to look at inside (though I did get an usher giving me a finger wag for no discernible reason).

            The next place we saw was Marienplatz, a square surrounded by impressive sites. One was the Neues Rathaus, awesomely ornate and with the town’s Glockenspiel with dancing figurines. Also there is the Altes Rathaus (old town hall), and St. Peter’s.

            We pass by the National Theater (also under construction), and see the Residenz Apartments (also under construction), where the Bavarian dukes used to live. We follow that (it takes up a whole block) to the Theatinerkirche, a church with a whole bunch of police officers and a priest questioning a guy outside of it. “Let’s…avoid this crowd,” said Neil. So I went in a different entrance. Turns out there was a protest in there, something about Turkey, and some tension was resulting. “This is a church!” one of the visitors said. The church itself was gorgeous, another wedding cake church, white and bright and huge, surprising after seeing its distinctively mustard exterior.

            Walking the rest of the way around the Residenz, we spot the Staatskanzlei, and make our way to the Hofbrauhaus, a famous beer hall where Hitler himself staged political events, an oompa band still plays, and Mozart and Lenin were said to be regulars. We all get sausage and kraut, when Kyle looks over and says, “This place is really touristy.” Because who should it be but the Whitest Family on Earth from the train (or as Neil calls them, “The Brady Bunch”) puzzling over a menu. “Do you need an English menu?” I ask. “Yes…oh!” says mom as she recognizes me. We get them the menus and I say, “I guess we’re just meant to help you today.” After we finish eating, Neil says to them, “See you later.”

            Now, we had ventured into the city knowing that Germany was playing in the Eurocup that night and, while nothing like Berlin, we had our fair share of soccer hooligans and broken bottles. After dinner, we realized that we were headed into the heart of the beast, Olympic Park. We went there to see the stadiums, which were quite cool, but there was also a giant screen set up to watch the game. So we got to see what 100s of soccer fans look like (by the way, they lost to Italy, which means that Italy will probably be consumed when we go).

            Finally, we head trek to see the impressive Nymphanberg Palace as it starts to get dark.

            By this time, I’m pooped. We take public transport back to the hostel where I basically collapse.

Kutna Hora, etc.

The day after our Prague tour, we take a bus to spend the day in Kutna Hora, a very picturesque and quaint town about an hour away. Stopping briefly at Our Lady of the Assumption church, we proceed to our main reason for going there-the Sedlec Ossuary  (or “Bone Church” as Kyle calls it). Because the land had supposedly been sprinkled with dirt from Golgotha brought back from the Holy Wars, it was a popular place to be interred, especially during the Black Death. With the crypts having thousands of bones that were placed there to make room, in the 1800s a local carpenter was hired to ‘put them in order.’ He decided to build 6 pyramids with the bones, and then dismantled two of them in order to decorate the chapel, arranging intricate patterns of bones along doorframes, making crosses, and other decorations such as a coat of arms and a giant chandelier. It’s truly an experience (and Kyle loved this).

            After we were done with the ossuary, we had some time, so we wandered a bit through town, seeing the plague memorial, the Ursuline convent, St. James, St. Barbara, the Jesuit seminary, the Stone House, and the Italian Court (which used to be the seat of the Czech king). We skipped their cigarette, baby buggy, and alchemy museums.

            Buying some food at a local store, we had a little picnic on the bus stop lawn. Kyle got a Kentucky Baguette because he thought that it sounded interesting (“I bet you they don’t even know what a baguette is in Kentucky. They’d be like, ‘Bag of what?’”).

            We got back to Prague and passed through a little street festival selling local foods. A rusty van with a sound system and drummers had pulled up and interpretive dancers (whose dances included writhing over the van, twitching, and throwing powder on one another) danced. They were probably there to promote Stomp.

            We ate some thin crust pizza with George (ham, cream, and mushroom), and then head for Café Louve (famous for being the place where “thinkers” like Kafka and Einstein used to hang out) for dessert. “Finally, a place for my mental equals,” says Kyle as he eats a giant piece of chocolate cake. I get warm raspberries with vanilla ice cream, nicknamed “Hot Love.”

            Then we go to George’s to pick up our laundry, have some tea, shoot Kyle with nerf guns, and say goodbye.

            The next morning, we get packed and are heading to Munich. At the station, I help the Whitest Family from America find their platform, and later their train car (Kyle: Those people were seriously whitebread). Then a foreign guy asks for help. And when on the train, another guy comes to my cabin for help. I should start a business.

            Oh, and Kyle picked up a (wrapped) Kit Kat off the train station floor and intends to eat it. Kyle said, “You’re going to write about this, aren’t you? Can’t a guy eat floor Kit Kat in peace?” No. You can’t.

Prague, pt. 2

 The next day, we have breakfast at the Penzion Alpin, which puts out a kind of random selection to choose from, including a big vat of hot dogs (on our last day there, they had chicken soup).

            This day was our Prague day with George, which proceeded without incident really (besides me almost falling on an old lady on the tram and seeing a girl with short-short short-shorts in the Jewish quarter.

            Here is a quick overview of what we did and saw (and I have to say that George is an excellent tour guide).

            On our way to meet our guide, we pass by the clocktower and Prague’s famous T.V. tower with its pods and babies crawling up it. We meet George in St. Wenceslaus Square by the National Museum (there is a guy protesting there with shirts hung up everyplace. “It’s national do your laundry day,” said George).

            George starts his tour at Prague Castle, started by the Holy Roman Empire (whose parts you can still see), and expanded and modified for centuries, so the entire complex is quite large and expansive. Some highlights are the theater, the gardens with its peacocks, the ‘drip wall’ (which was a Gothic wall created by dripping cement meant to hide monstrous faces. It was reconstructed after WWII), Sternberk Palace, the Gothic cathedral of St. Vitus (under construction for centuries), a Communist memorial, St. George’s, and so on.

            Leaving there, we pass the Kafka museum with its odd kinetic statues, and the replicas of the T.V. antenna babies with bar codes stamped deep into their faces and shiny behinds because it’s really popular with tourists to rub them for some reason. We pass the Love Lock Bridge, with its hundreds of padlocks clipped on the rails, many of which are inscribed with names of couples. Legend goes that you and your significant other clip the lock on with your left hand and throw the key into the river with your right to represent your everlasting love (the irony is that the city routinely clips them off to make more room). We would see other lock bridges in other cities, but Prague’s was by far the most popular. We proceed to the Lennon Wall, which started as a tribute to John Lennon after his death (people left items and graffitied the wall), and continued as a protest after the Soviets kept trying to cover it up and stop it (Lenin vs. Lennon).

            We saw St. Nicholas Cathedral in Lesser Town, before crossing the Charles Brides with its many statues. Some of the more famous of these include the one with the little boy you rub to make a wish come true (and he’s now burnished from years of rubbing), the crucifix whose Hebrew letters were ripped off by neo-Nazis and thrown in the river (recovered by scuba divers and restored), and the spot where the queen’s confessor was thrown into the river because he wouldn’t reveal the queen’s lover to the king (supposedly, they recovered his body and his tongue was perfectly preserved). The bridge empties out to a statue of Charles himself, the Holy Roman Emperor responsible for many reforms in Prague.

            We head into Old Town Square to see the Church of Tyne with its twin towers, one of which is slightly taller than the other, said to be the brother. Also there is one of the few remaining Hussite churches, and the Rococo Kinsky Palace. Additionally, in the center of the square stands a statue of a Protestant martyr, Jan Hus and 14 crosses inlaid in stone in the ground where 14 other martyrs died.

            Here also is the famous Astronomical Clock. Created by a mechanical genius of his time, it was so amazing that the city worried that he would create another for a rival city, so they had him blinded. Learning that he had been blinded by government agents and not random bandits, he killed himself by throwing himself on the clock’s works, thereby ruining it. It was hundreds of years before they could figure out how to fix it. We happened to be there to hear it chime on the hour, where a tiny skeleton rings his death knell, apostles revolve, and a golden cock crows (as we were waiting, we see a kid dressed like a Dickens character weaving in the crowd. Neil: Who is this, the Artful Dodger?).

            On the way to the Jewish Quarter, we stop for lunch (delicious Wiener Schnitzel), pass Gunpowder Tower (guess what they used to keep there), and stop in St. Agnes Convent, a nunnery from the 1200s.

            Prague’s Jewish Quarter is one of the oldest in the world, and it has become a place of pilgrimage for many of the world’s Jews. As we enter it, George points to a shop and says, “You know you’re in the Jewish Quarter when there’s a goat on the butcher’s sign and not a pig.” We see the odd Kafka statue (who lived in the Jewish quarter), and see the girl in the shorty shorts, before going into some synagogues: the beautiful and richly decorated Spanish Synagogue (with its menorah that Michelle Obama borrowed after she toured there), the Maisel Synagogue, the Klausen Synagogue, and the Pinkas, whose walls are filled with the thousands of names of Czech Jews who died in the holocaust written in tiny writing. Another holocaust reminder are the small brass plaques on the sidewalks throughout the Jewish Quarter in front of many of the former residences which tell who used to live there and how they were killed. We also see the Old-New Synagogue, Europe’s oldest active synagogue, which still has a bullet hole in its side from an uprising, and where the golem of Prague supposedly resides (legend has it that a Gestapo officer tried to go into the attic and perished at the hands of the golem. Out of superstition, the Germans then left the synagogue alone, which is why it still stands).  Additionally, we saw the Old Jewish Cemetery, with its layers of graves dating back to the 1400s, and tombstones leaning haphazardly. We see that people still leave stones and coins on the graves that they’re able to reach, many of which are Israeli.

            We leave the Quarter to see the Prague Philharmonic, the National Theater, and the opera house, where Mozart famously premiered Don Giovanni, and there is a creepy statue there to commemorate this. George takes us down National Road, where the students began their protests that led to the Velvet Revolution, and shows us its memorial: a sculpture of a bunch of hands making peace signs (a satirical group once hung a plaque making a ‘sieg heil’ sign next to it to highlight Prague’s racism problems).

            We stopped at a very nice ice cream parlor (where I had, I think, the best chocolate ice cream I’ve ever eaten), and saw our last 2 landmarks: the brightly painted Jubilee Synagogue and the famous Upside Down Horse statue (a parody of  the St. Wenceslaus statue, meant to symbolize the topsy-turvy days of the revolution).

            To end the day, we try to go to the Big Lebowski, but it’s apparently a newspaper stand during the day, run by completely different people. So we go have some pho at a little Vietnamese place, which we eat standing up with dogs winding between our legs, before returning to the Big Lebowski. It turns out to be very much a hippy-dippy establishment, with ripped carpet, pillows on the floor, and large stuffed animals. When George tried to pay later, he was informed by our lanky faerie/aerie waitress that they don’t believe in prices; pay what you think it’s worth.

            We finished the night by going to a local Biergarten, eating delicious brats (or, as Kyle said “dessert”), watching some adventure program on the soccer screen, and eventually meeting George’s linguist friends.

Dresden

            The next day, because George has to work, we decide to make an unscheduled day trip to Dresden. When we arrive at the station, we find that our train has been delayed. Kyle gets some ketchup-flavored chips and we watch the board, waiting for our platform to be announced. I overhear a confused older couple trying to figure their train out. I help them get straight and turn around to see an Asian couple coming over for help with their ticket (even though I was able to figure out what they needed, I was unable to communicate it. Oh, well). Kyle said, “I’m surprised a line didn’t start forming.”

            When our train finally arrived, we find a cabin with a middle aged German couple. Soon, we hear a distinctly American twang ask if he could take the last seat in the cabin. He asks where we’re from, says that he’s from Tennessee, and we begin to swap travel stories as he was very chatty.
He: My plane broke from Detroit
Me: Ours too.
He: Did ya’ll fly Delta?
Me: Yeah
He: What day?
It was then that we figured out that we had been scheduled for the same flight. Small World. So, we shared some more travel tales (his included seeing a naked bicycle protest in London), and it turns out that we had been many of the same places. He was quite well-traveled, as well as very talkative and friendly. Kyle shared his retirement plan: to buy a boat and guide ‘any language tours’, then just mumble into the mic since no one can understand them anyway. The German couple seemed amused by this and Mr. Tennessee, so when he asked them about the specialties of the area that he could buy, they communicated for awhile using their decent English and drawing pictures. They then began pointing out points of interest along the way. Arriving at Dresden, we all went our merry ways.

            Feeling like a combination between Vienna and Berlin, Dresden is a very charming city with a lot of history. It used to known as the ‘Florence on the Elbe’, and was renowned for its beauty. Now, it is primarily known for being almost completely destroyed in WWII (it’s said that Churchill picked it out specially to get back at Germany for the bombing of Coventry), which killed over 30000 people. They are still in the process of reconstructing what they can, using bits of the old buildings and photographs.

            Once we get into Dresden, while we do see New Market, we spent most of our time in Old Market and the historical section of town, starting with the Kreuz Church, and proceeding to the iconic (and beautiful) Frauenkirche. We then saw the Albertinum and then the Art Museum, walking along the Bruel Terrace which runs along the Elbe River, where there’s a park with some manicured trees and the Dom, which looks like a wedding cake inside, all white and gold.

            Across the way was the Semper Opera House (Semperoper) where many composers used to premiere their work, including Strauss and Wagner. We then saw the Royal Palace (Residenzschloss) and the Procession of Princes, a pathway that was created to celebrate the Saxony rulers that is lined with a mural created with small porcelain tiles. Finally, we saw the Zwinger, a large palace complex with many buildings including the green vault, and lovely grounds.

            After that, it was about time for us to go. On the way home, our train cabinmates were again very friendly. They were 2 English girls who reminded me of plump versions of the Pigeon sisters from The Odd Couple. We chatted and shared stories and they giggled about the creeper who was eating a banana and staring at one of them, drawing the curtain and peeping out (so we swapped creeper stories). They loaned us a headphone splitter so Neil and I could watch a movie and Neil helped them with their luggage when we got off the train.

            We met George for dinner, and he told us a legend of Prague’s hairy ghost who drags girls into the river as we walked to the Afghan place, where we met up with Tony and his girlfriend. The Afghan place is small and highly decorated. George orders a bunch of dishes to share. The meal includes a naan-like bread, rice, spinach, daal, pumpkin, eggplant, zucchini, lamb, and a beef/tomato/egg dish. It was very good and even Kyle liked it.

            Afterwards, George took us to a very nice establishment called Hemingway’s, with rich leather seating and a very knowledgeable and attentive staff.

Prague, Part 1

After stopping along the road for a lunch consisting of French fries and a big block of fried cheese, which is a Slovak specialty, we drove the rest of the way into Prague and returned the car to the agency.

            Prague will always be special to me, as it was my first European city. But, besides that, it combines a lot of what I like about other cities into one. It is both old and modern, in many way progressive, but proud of its heritage. It has a history of artistic expression, and a tradition of active student life. It is more diverse than many European cities that we’ve been to of late (Kyle commented that it has gotten more white the farther east we go), though, admittedly, it does have its problems with racism. Not nearly as damaged by WWII as many Bohemian cities, much of its architecture was left standing to tell the story of 1000s of years of empires and struggles, from the Holy Romans to the Soviets.

            The first thing we do in Prague is drop some laundry off at George’s (thank God), and help him carry water up to his apartment as they are turning his water off in a few days for maintenance. We check into our Bed and Breakfast, which George has arranged. It is very nice, with a large bedroom for Neil and I, and a private bath with a bathtub with a shower attachment. Neil and I even have our own little kitchenette.

            For dinner, we meet up with George’s friend Tony who we met at George’s wedding. He’s the one who reminded us of someone, but we couldn’t put our finger on whom. We finally figured it out when I said, “Rex!” Yes, I know that I’m comparing him to a dog, but I mean it in the best possible way. Anyway, Tony had been cherry picking that day, and he presented me with a small bucket filled with cherries, which was quite sweet of him.

            That night, we went for Czech food. George, Neil, and Kyle all had pig knuckle, which came out on their own individual spits. Tony shared his roast duck with me, as he wanted me to have strength for the train tomorrow, even though I still had about a pound of cheese in my stomach. Afterwards, we went to the oldest Pilsner pub in Prague. The soccer game was on and in overtime. We left.

            We meandered a bit and saw some of Prague’s nightlife around and beyond St. Wenceslaus Square. Everyone, tired and full, began to find their ways home. George tried to give directions from the metro that included the phrase “turn at Albert.” What he didn’t tell us was that Albert was a grocery store, not a road. So, we ended up wandering for a long time, as we didn’t even know the road name, since George had booked it. Finding out that even cabbies don’t seem to know where our Penzion is, Neil decides to run ahead to see if he could find it. And, believe it or not, he did. We all stumble the rest of the way there, then fall into bed to get some rest for Dresden tomorrow.

Spis, Part 2

The next morning, Kyle wanted breakfast, and Jana’s parents generously offered to provide one. I left Kyle’s pillowcase on his doorstep with a note in red ink reading, ‘If you want to see your pillow again, be ready by 7:45. P.S. This is written in your pillow’s blood.’ He was and he got his pillow back before heading over to Jana’s family’s apartment. There, they had a nice spread of hard sausage, rolls, cheese, etc. Neil and I are persuaded to eat, so I eat a roll and some tea. They bring out the cake again for Kyle, and he has 2 pieces.

            This is our day to see Spis, and we see some amazing sites. First, we take a short [Edited to add that Neil objects to the word ‘short’] hike up the hillside and take a tour through an ice cave, where cold air created beautiful formations of ice in the mountain millions of years old. It used to be used by shepherds before becoming an attraction. The Slovaks used to train their Olympic skaters in there.

            We then visit the little town of Lavoca, which is very charming, with the church with the world’s largest wooden altar, and a communist memorial, 1300 year-old walls from the Tartar invasion, and the ‘cage of shame’ where they used to place criminals so the townspeople could mock and throw things at them. We stop for a Kofola, and Jana’s family offers to buy Kyle ice cream.

            We drive to a nearby place for lunch, to see how busy it is, and find it overrun by tourists. So, we decide to go to Spis Castle now.

            Spis Castle is an amazing site, even from a great distance. Initially started by the Celts, it was used by the Holy Roman Empire, etc., before a large fire left it pretty much not operational. The castle complex is very impressive, with some rooms even outfitted to show what they would have looked like, including the torture chamber. We saw the ancient crapper, and narrow stone stairway, and some sword fighting reinactors. The view from there was very nice, and there was a horse design on the hill that was based on a Celtic coin design. There were 2 guys on the hill coming up that were selling souvenirs, all of which were “perfect.” Jana bought a “perfect” horse and Neil bought a “perfect” glass. It was also here that Jana’s mother bought Kyle ice cream.

            We went to lunch at a pizza place (I:cheese, Neil: corn and olive).

            We went back to Jana’s family’s briefly and then headed to take a mini-hike up to the cliff. That was pretty breathtaking. And Neil got teased about his fear of heights. And we wanted him to spin through the fields singing, “The Hills are Alive.”

            We went back to the Penzion to freshen up a bit, then went into town via bus with George and Jana, who pointed out the points of interest in Spisska Nova Ves: St. James (with the tallest steeple in Slovakia), the town hall, the theater, the evangelical church, the Soviet war memorial, etc.). We had dinner, at which all of us but Jana got pirohy, then went to a local place for dessert. Jana and I shared a strawberry panna cotta. During dessert, she looked over and asked, “What kind of bug is that?” Neil said, “It’s a hummingbird.” Jana replied, “We don’t have hummingbirds.” “You do now,” said Neil.

            We hung out for awhile reminiscing (like, ‘Remember the time we decided to go possum hunting?’), then took a taxi back to the Penzion.

            Today, we spent most of the day driving to Prague with George and Neil in a rented car. Jana had to go to Budapest for school. We had driven through some beautiful mountainous country. It’s rare that the road trip game you get to play is ‘Spot the Castle.’